having a bad week

this week feels extra long because it's the week after a bank holiday.

and ofcourse it is this extra long week that just isn't going well for me.

everyone has to have a bad week at some point - it makes you appreciate the good weeks and besides it's not like i live in a war zone, things can always be worse, at least that what i tell myself when i start getting palpitations about a rubbish situation.

i should have known it was going to be a bad week when i had a very unpleasant experience with a very rude man first thing Monday morning at work. that should have cried out 'this is going to be a bad week'. instead i took it to be just a bad day...

we're having double glazing fitted this week. i rent a place with some chicks i know. and while the bay windows definitely have more character and look pretty - we were really freezing our pretty little asses off this winter just gone so we asked the landlord to intervene.

so there are builders in the house everyday and everyday i come home to a new problem. i'm beginning to dread going home! added to this there is a nice black film of dust on everything in my room. don't these people cover stuff up when they work?! horrid! and my room smells of builder. you know the aroma, something you can't quite pinpoint but a mixture of dust, sawdust and plaster.

i'm really missing my boyfriend this week too. he lives across the pennines and i only get to see him at weekends. glad it's another bank holiday weekend coming up so i get to see him an extra day.

roll on Friday 5.30 that's what i say!

busy doing nothing

isn't it nice to sometimes just do nothing?

this weekend i was in sheffield with my beau and we did sweet f.a.

and sweet it was. reading the papers, eating mini-milks, listening to planet rock, going to various public houses, drinking rasperry beer, watching nonsense on dvd, tuning in to Jonathan Ross on Friday night and Saturday morning!

we were loving it.

and then suddenly just when you're really relaxed, it's Sunday evening and you have to go home and get ready for work. rubbish. i need a three or four day week cos two days off just ain't enough! haha

heard a top quote on the train home tho - a chick was bleating on to some friend of hers on her mobile phone and she says "the problem with him is, Dean, he's got no common sense, you know, no brain..." well yes i'd have to agree that sounds like a problem.

davidbowieisverydisappointedinyou

check this out http://www.davidbowieisverydisappointedinyou.com/
it's brilliant!

anyone who enjoyed Labyrinth will know that it was David Bowie's finest hour.
whether you enjoy his pre-drug, on the drugs or post-drug era of music for me there'll always be a special place in my heart for the Goblin Prince.. hehe

another great movie from the 80s was The Princess Bride starring that dude from Columbo and the kid Savage. there's a great quote that goes something like this 'life's hard princess, and anyone who tells you different is selling something', ain't that the truth!

another great discovery i made this week is a new band called The Pipettes. i heard them on Radio 1 in a segment called Fresh Meat - nice! anyway they have a single out called Your Kisses are Wasted on Me and it's wicked! but on further investigation i can only find it in manchester stores on vinyl... those pesky cool cats, who has a record player in this day and age?! i'd like one certainly, but they take up so much room... i used to have a series of those boxed record players that were easy to pack away - but then the last one i had broke and i never found another...
but i am seriously considering actually buying a record player just so that i can play this single...
it's really really good!!
check them out here http://www.myspace.com/thepipettes

70mph baby!

this month i have been in possession of a full driving licence a whole year.. and in june i will have owned a car for a whole year.. and in september i'll have been regularaly driving a whole year.. but yesterday i went on a motorway for the first time!

woohoo! 70mph baby! get me!

i went on the M602 and then M62 all the way to Ikea and my mum said i done good!
i even went in the fast lane.
i did get a crick in my neck from the stress, but that's only to be expected on such a virgin voyage, right?!

my boyfriend doesn't like driving on motorways.
but then i don't think he likes driving much fullstop.
but i don't mind much cos i am finally going to be better than him at something! hehe

i don't get to drive much now that i have to get the bus to work. and i really miss it. i only get to go to sainsbois in my little motor now. and that's not very far at all!

tho since i stopped drinking i've been driving into town more which is nice little practice for me.

people like driving, let's do more of it!

bankholidaze

it's day 3 into a five day break for me.

so far i've: rid our kitchen of a colony of ants, had my car washed by illegal immigrants*,
watched a top bank holiday movie**, eaten too many hot cross buns, been to PC World AND Curry's to look at computers for my man, been to TGI Fridays with my boyf, brother and dad for expensive amercian style fodder, eaten too much chocolate - i'm supposed to be on a diet!!!

so far, so bankholidaze.

regards the ants. i'm actually quite traumatised by the situation that presented itself to me on Good Friday. bleary-eyed i stumbled into the kitchen only to be faced with a single ant. now what little i know of ants is that there's never only one. there's no problem in ant society that created the lone ant. the ant who nobody else understands. even teenage ants follow the ant way of life. so i looked for the rest of his mates and sure enough they were making light work of our bin. disgusting. what to do? i've never had to deal with ants before. so i got the sponge from the sink and set about ridding our home of these little pests. only for my housemate to cry out 'you're not killing them are you? they're intelligent beings'
what else was i supposed to do? surrender it as ant territory?!
2 hours later our kitchen was spotless and ant free. i went to sainsbois and got us anti-ant stuff and i'm happy to report that since then only a couple of ants have made it back and found nothing for their efforts.
exhausting and traumatising.
later on that eveing, every time i closed my eyes i saw angry ants. their little antennae (what's the plural on that?!) pointing at me accusedly.
i'm sorry, okay. and i'm a vegetarian!


*i'm only guessing. they look a little slavic to me. and i reckon a job like that must be cash in hand. hehe. i'm too busy to wash my car myself so i pay others to do it for me. i'm creating employment. i am like a god. ; )

**Flash Gordon. o yes! and it wasn't even the listed movie. i sat down expecting Batteries Not Included. nothing like a bit of retro movie action on your day off (especially after having just commited genocide in your kitchen). but there was Ming the Merciless with his Hot Hail and killer Queen soundtrack! fabulous! now that's a Good Friday!

it was only a dream

i had a dream i snogged George Clooney*!

now, incase you were wondering, that's a nice dream! and it's my only comfort today as i'm feeling a bit under the weather (literally, have you ever lived in Manchester?!)

so i decided this was my body's way of impressing upon me the need for some Clooney Therapy(TM) and figured i could dig out my copy of Ocean's Eleven this evening and that would be that! however, on mentioning said dream to my galpal Victoire she suggested i get my mitts on a copy of Solaris for full Clooney appreciation.

this reminded me of the time i tried to hire Solaris thru my dvd club Lovefilm.com. TWICE! it is, ofcourse, the title of a Russki film from the 70s that's oh so boring i nearly decided to end it all whilst watching it. how utterly disappointing to be expecting the Cloones in all his glory and get some dodgy foreign film! now, i enjoy the odd european offering, but there's a time and a place people! so i sent it back and demanded the correct Solaris, but some evil doer in their packing office sent me the same Ruskki nonesense. i was livid. and didn't even try to order the George one again.

i've just called Music Zone and they have it for £2.97!
so i'm off there at lunchtime.
that's my evening sorted.
brilliant.


*if my man is allowed to dream about Kylie i am allowed to dream about Clooney. Oh and Robert Williams. and The Hoff? hehe

wax on wax hoff

i went to a karate class last night. i used to do karate when i was about 7. i don't remember whether i particularly enjoyed it. i remember my mum did it too. so that's probably why i was there. though i think it was around the time of the splendid eighties movie Karate Kid...

recently i have been gaining weight on account that i don't do anything with my fat lazy ass. so instead of joining an extortionately priced gym* i thought 'i could do karate!'

so i went along last night to my first class. pink troosers to show 'em who's boss and only a little bit scared. i was the only beginner. and the only other girl was not a friendly sort and only joined the class once it had started.

i was enjoying it to begin with. lots of fun moves to learn and balance and streching and - y'know exercise! 'this'll do nicely' i thought. but then about half way thru the class my instructor tells us about a move with a downwards kick to the side. 'this is to break the knee'. Eww! i don't wanna break anyone's knee! it is then that i remember you have to, like, fight, in karate. real people. get bruises. oh dear. this won't do at all!

how could i have forgotten that an essential part of karate is biffing people with karate chops! haha, i'm such a girl sometimes**

so i mean to go back next week but y'know long term i think i'm gonna have to stick my hippie Yoga...

peace & love out


* how come you have to sign up for a gym for a year, no ifs no buts, when you can quit your house or your gym in just a month?! which muscle bound eejit thought that one up?! well i for one won't have it and i know plenty of other people who can't be doing with it either! i also know lots of those people who signed up to join, went regular for four weeks and since then have been once in 3 months. what a rip off! we need stelios to bring us pay as you go easyGyms! (but please stelios - no kids! they just pee in the pool! haha)

** i mean this not in a derogatory sense, but in a flattering sense, y'know - only a girl would see the beauty of karate catta's (or whateva they're called) and think 'now there's a pleasant way to spend an hour!' when the reality is broken toes!
tsk. i've been on a website this week called thefword and it's all about ladies standing up for themselves in this patriachal society of ours!
Your country needs you!!

Guilty Pleasures

Do you have something in your life that makes you warm and fuzzy inside but you'd rather chew your own arm off than admit it to your peers? haha

A guilty pleasure is just that. Something that brings you joy and yet it's a little bit dark, and perhaps something to be ashamed of. My boyfriend might say this of his Athelete's Foot. Though I'm worried he's not very embarrassed to admit it...

I indulged in one of my own guilty pleasures last night. Yes that's right. On a Thursday night! And I had accomplices!* We went to see Failure to Launch. A chick flick if ever there was one. A romantic comedy, ladies and gentlemen. They are one of my guilty pleasures and boy do they make me feel dirty! haha

It starred Sarah Jessica Parker in her first movie role since SATC and the lovely, nay, very lovely Matthew McConnaghey**. And it was actually not that bad. Some real gem lines in there. And comedy animals. Excellent. What was wrong with it is that the lead characters are in their 30s while the actors playing them are in their 40s - and clearly so, not even borderline! haha, How arrogant is that?! And to make it worse, SJP's character Paula had a 'flatmate' - supposedly a peer of hers - who looked about 25! Which really didn't do SJP any favours the poor lass... Ah well. These are not things to get het up about when it comes to candyfloss cinema.

Since I'm feeling confessioanl this morning, I may as well admit my love for all RomComs with Miss Meg Ryan in. I even own When Harry Met Sally (a classic!) and You Got Mail on VHS. Oh dear. How to absolve myself of such girlish indulgence?! Is it possible? How many films with subtitles will I have to have seen before I am purged of the taint of popcorn cinema?! haha

Maybe I'm being too tough on myself though? Maybe since I am in fact 'a chick', class myself as 'a romantic' and indeed love 'a good comedy' I am merely the target audience for this kind of soppy silly nonsense. What would life be like if it weren't for the odd giggle in life's rainy afternoons?! haha

Enough said.


*I will not name and shame. They know who they are. hehe

**I met him once. I was in Rome and he was filming some U-Boat movie with Jon Bon Jovi. Who was also there but of no interest to me. Even though he was the more famous of the two at the time. T
hey were at a sports bar I frequented called Ned Kelly and word spread via American college kids that superstars were in the midst.
I was a big fan of the Macconnaghey magic, as he's in one of my fave films ever 'Dazed & Confused'.
He was tall and handsome (the former tres unusual for Hollywood/TV stars) and I offered to give him a tour of Rome, haha - the arrogance of youth! And I gave him my card - such was the social convention in Rome (and when in Rome?!)
He never called.
Damn. : )

filthy habit

what will follow is a short rant about how much I dislike smokers.

if you are a smoker, either look away now or accept that I am right (as always) and throw the filthy cancer sticks away today.

smoking is a disgusting habit. it makes you smell. it makes your fingers yellow. it makes your teeth brown. it makes the decor in your home go a shade of brown. it takes away your ability to taste and smell. and if that weren't enough, it's likely to kill you!

it is definitely NOT cool.

my boyfriend - a smoker in rehabilitation cos it costs too much - thinks the opposite. he says it's very cool. NO IT ISN'T!
and it's this arrogant delusional belief system that makes me have no sympathy for the fag junkies! how can smelling so bad that I think I'm gonna catch Cancer just sitting next to you ever be cool or anything near it?!

my housemate CF is a closet smoker. these are the sneakiest sort. they're in denial of the fact a drug has got them hooked and have them only when they're with their 'smoker friends' - like it's a secret club or something.

and another thing about smoker's, they're so blinking selfish. all of them. the drug has got them so desperate that basic human decency goes out the window. once upon a time they might have ventured 'would you mind if I smoke?' and actually mean it. that was before it really had them by the short and curlies. now, if you're lucky and they're feeling generous, they think 'I'll just wait til they've got the last morsel of food on their plate before I light up' RUINING a perfectly good meal with their cancerous puffs.

nice that.

I am so glad that pubs are going to have to ban smoking. Once upon a time you could smoke upstairs on a bus. It meant that it was full of smoke and half empty because who in their right mind would want to sit in that?! When I was younger you could smoke on one side of the cinema! How ridiculous is that? Like the smoke didn't float over the enitre auditorium?! Haha, a smoker's idea I'll bet. 'Oh you can't expect us smoker's to go without our hit for 90 minutes'. And they had an interval back then! When I was in New York earlier this year I was in a non-smoking heaven. You could breathe in every bar and restaurant, go home at the end of the without stinging eyes and stinking clothes.. Brilliant!

Just becuse you've always done something doesn't make it right! Just because smokers have always trounced no-smokers human rights to breathe clean air doesn't mean that they should be able to continue to do so! Sure have your little bike sheds and your little junkie posses - but keep me out of it!

So stick that in your pipe and smoke it!

Humph.

Rant Ends.

: )

too many hobbies

I am suffering from too many hobbies.

Which isn't the idea of a hobby at all.

I love learning new stuff, little tit bits of info that come in useful hardly ever, but terribly impressive when they do! (my job is a great source of this info - I know some really random stuff - especially about new build property guarantees^ hehe)

So since I just turned 30 I thought I'd better get a move on before my brain cells become an ethnic minority.

So I picked up a guitar and now I know 7 chords and a real song! (well most of one anyway). I keep my nails short and everything! Rock n roll!

Then I picked up a book on writing stand up comedy. I wrote a massive lists of topics. Only one of which I expanded on and wasn't loving my work, so that's on the 'to do list'... How disappointing to not be hilarious?!
AND I'm from Liverpool...*

My other new hobby is on standby too - I want to be a better cook cos I love food so much. I decided to master my favourite dishes; Vegetable Lasagne, Vegetarian Cottage Pie and Banofee Pie. Mmm, yummy! But now I'm on a diet** I can't possibly eat any of them so I'm not going to make them am I?

I'm reading too many books too. I'm currently reading Paul Auster's latest offering The Brooklyn Follies, this guy rules*** but its un-put-down-able-ness, while impressive, is keeping me up past my bedtime! Pah, those pesky talented authors...

The answer is obvious, I must work a three day week! haha
Chance'd be a fine thing!

On a final note, I'd just like to show my appreciation for another of my favourite past times - listening to Radio 4. There's nothing quite like it. And while cheeky little upstarts like BBC7 vie for my attention, I will always feel happiest with the warm, no-nonsense Radio 4. Home Truths is on right now and I am quite clearly loving it! Worth the licence fee alone! Well...

Right.
So do I strum, read or Radio 4 it before snoozetime?


^I used to write a lot of property ads which led to my meeting lots of property builders who told me about how a new building naturally settles in the first two years so any cracks in the paint work can be touched up under the guarantee and usually nothing to worry about. Random, but useful when your friend just moved into one!

*my boyfriend says people from Liverpool aren't funny. Oh yeah? Well, why does internationally successful comedian Mike Myers impersonate scousers in all his movies huh? Because he recognises their inherent funniness, that's why! hehe

**don't even go there. I am doing sit ups and having a word with myself regards my general sedentary lifestyle.

***read The New York Trilogy too - it's brilliant!