Tuesday, October 31, 2006

my travels in the kingdom of blog

i don't usually get time to surf the blog-world since i'm presently not hooked up at home*
but today i've had a quiet spell with which to indulge in the world wide web and i'm pleased to report it has put me in a very good mood!

first i looked for an old blog i used to read by newyorkhack but that linked me to some other cabbies who blog http://cabsareforkissing.blogspot.com/ and http://londoncabby.blogspot.com/

i think that a cabbies life must be quite interesting. sure you'll always get rubbish punters who are rude or abusive, perhaps just smelly ones, but then you'll see some eye-opening things too right? and you'll see people from all walks of life. i always try and have a friendly chat with a cabbie but some are just not sociable at all. which begs the question, why be a cabbie if you don't like people?!

but by far my favourite blog i found today is http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/chrisevans/
i've been listening to his radio2 drivehome and frankly he's back on form.
no-one likes listening to lazy radio, which is what he started to produce i think back in the late 90s was it? seems a lifetime ago.
whatever - if you ever like his heart warming 'everyone come and be in my gang' radio then you'll enjoy his radio2 stuff and moreover his blog. some great entries which are further enhanced by listeners comments. brilliant. interactive blogging baby!

everyone should blog! some cynical f*ckwits say of blogs that they are uninteresting drivel which will never be read, remembered or loved. i say blogging is an easy way to express your life to anyone who might stumble across it! why are we here on this planet but to tell others of our story. human beans have always loved telling and hearing stories. the basis of good stand up comedy is story telling which is probably why i love it so much. so what if you're not interested in what someone has blogged? don't read it then! simple.

there are people in this world who want to make you smile. and then there are those who are miserable and want to inflict in on everyone around them!

well stuff them!

watch some of these - they always make me smile - if only for the theme tune!



*my landlord promised me broadband but then renegged on this promise as soon as i'd moved in - outrageous behaviour! i'd move out on principle but after 13 years of renting i am SO sick of moving!

Monday, October 30, 2006

limp wrists

i went bowling this weekend with my friends Vicky, Kate and Clare and my man.

i like bowling but i can only last one match before my wrist goes all limp and hurty!
rubbish! i'm quite pathetic when it comes to anything physical. a mis-spent youth infront of the telly i guess... the shows are gross tho, especially since i have the most average ladies show size, they're well worn them sixes!

but i didn't get one strike this weekend - i was gutted! i usually get one at least! i go dead centre most bowls but the b*stards wouldn't go down! my mate Kate was a hustler - she moseys on up, casually bowls and strike central! haha

we were sharing the lane seating area with a bunch of kids who we were fighting with for the lighter balls! haha
but i think it's a bit rubbish you only get one bench per lane - that's not enought clearly!
we took it turns to sit down between bowls!

frankly bowling exhuasted me! it was all so exciting!
a little victory every time you hit the pins!
the misery of geting a Gutter Ball!
the disappointment of a single pin! Bummer indeed! haha

first game was funny cos, excluding the fella, the girls final place was in order of height! tallest winning, shortest last!* mental! my man took a picture... which i'd load up but i'm not sure how to... ruined!

they had a tv screen with pop videos on interspersed with ads for the bowling alley.
the fast food looked very unappetising but the Cosmic Bowling looked amazing!
apparently, regularly, they do bowling disco-style! brilliant! that's next on my to-do list!

talking of lists - my friend Kate said she had a list of things she'd wanted to do before she was 32. i asked her what was on it but she said it was more of an idea of a list than a list which i think goes a long way to explain why it's not been completed!

an idea of a list?! you either have a list or you don't! haha it made us all think about our possible lists tho i think lists are scary and if you put a time limit on stuff you're asking for trouble!

a student i met recently who wants to get a job in radio said with the confidence only a 21 year old can have 'if i don't make it in a year that's it! i'm obviously never going to make it and i'll do something else'
eek!

i pleaded with her not to make grand deadlines on her dream! but i guess you live n learn.
i certainly did. i nearly gave myself a heart attack with the pressure i was putting on myself to achieve big media moves the year or so after graduating. just doesn't happen that way eh?
£12K p.a. and rent to pay = no big media career, haha

just keep on rockin' that's what i say!

how did we get so philosophical from bowling?! haha



* not me! hehe ; )

she broke up with me

i just called my gym to postpone my personal trainer session tmro night, for a fortnight, while i worked on the stuff she showed me in the last two sessions. a bit of catch up time!

but she said she's leaving Thursday for a better paid job!
so she's getting some other chick from the gym to call me to arrange a session, but i really liked Erin!

i'm gutted.

i feel like we've broken up after only 3 dates! haha
she drank beer! where am i going to find another personal trainer who drinkes beer for chr*ssakes!

i am SO giving up PTs after this last session.
it's too weird them hanging about while you get sweaty anyway.
and they're so unreliable!
i don't need to feel insecure about anything else in my life thankyou!

but we'll always have the ball exercises...
happy times!

i guess it's gods way of telling me i'll never be a size 10 again! haha

tumbleweeds

Music In: Ominous, mysterious tones
Mvo: Eerie, narrator read

It was the last night of the manchester comedy festival...
The girls drove around the quiet back streets looking for Charlies...
Venturing tentatively, they soon discovered they would have the last laugh!

Mwah hahahahahahaha

Music Out:

Sunday night i was party to a very intimate comedy performance from one Alex Laserev.
being the only person who had bought tickets! i'm so very glad i didn't go by myself,* that would have been REALLY embarrassing.
as it was it was just quite embarrassing...

poor bloke. he was up from London for his big gig and nobody had bothered getting him any punters. so he tells me, my housemate Jo, some dude Mike from WFM** and his box office chick his story of being deported.

i giggle all the way thru - it's just the kinda girl i am - i'm good comedy audience right here! i only ever shout out nice/silly things and i always laugh.

well unless you're really rubbish! or 'just for the blokes' material. which is just lazy!

but i giggled thru matey's story of deportation.
and it was a really great set.
shame that only me and two other people saw it!

after his story we took him for a drink round at the fab cafe - i felt so sorry for him and he was taking it all very well!

in the bar we drank tea because i was driving and he doesn't drink, but Jo had alcopops.
what ensued i can only descibe a surreal group massagathon! haha***
he asked me to rub his bad shoulder and when i failed to apply enough pressure he said he's show me how it's done and proceeded to stick his fingers into my spine - ow!
but he gets Jo to do his back and we're in this line in the fab cafe - massaging! haha
then some dude from across the bar comes and sits infront of me and his mate goes behind Jo -it's a mass spontanteous back massage club! haha

surreal is not the word.

jolly good fun for a sunday night tho eh?!


*which i nearly did cos my comedy buddy blew me out and i had to find a last minute replacement!

**Alex had done a radio interview that morning on this guys show - WFM is the best community radio station ever! 97.2 kids!

***boyfriend: don't worry! it's not like it sounds! haha

Friday, October 27, 2006

yey it's friday!

oh i do love a Friday!

i even got a free dessert today! now that's a proper perk of the job!

i have a jam packed sociable weekend planned and it's all kicking off as soon as my man and my very good friend Vicky turn up, thel atter of which is currently pooling up the M6 the former of which managed to get out of bed before 4pm and still isn't on a train! i ask you! it's like he doesn't want to see Simon Munnery tonight!

ooh how exciting, more comedy! : )

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

i did laugh

yes i did!

last night the book club was very good indeed. oh bless Robin Ince and his merry men (and women) - they made my face hurt from laughing too much! brilliant!

i am having a night off from comedy tonight... i've been sleep deprived since last week now and it's no good for an old bird like me! i'm getting seriously tired eyes! it's not a good look!

i went to London on Friday and stayed up late drinking with my man's buddies, only to be rudely awakened to a 7.30am start - on a Saturday?! i ask you?! Up we went to Essex for a thing at the man's old university and another late night was had by all! sleepy jo then trudles back to Manchester only to be whisked to a Russel Brand gig! mental! i'm going to bed at 9pm tonight!

a surprise edition at the book club was Simon Munnery, who we're seeing on Friday night at Giggle n Funk - oh Simon is so loverly! his Urban Warrior still scares me a bit but he's so nice when he's just being Simon Munnery...

and i have to give a special mention to Graeme White and his accordian - i want to play the acordian! he was concentrating so hard - the man's a genius! me and my mate Ruth were clenching for him it looked so hardcore! ooh it did make us giggle...

why can't every week be a comedy festival?!

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

comedy overload

its the manchester comedy festival! woohoo!
it's like a mini Edinburger!
i must say i'm very exicted about it all...

i've seen Russell of the Brand, We Are Klang and Phil Nichol already with more booked in!

We Are Klang were amazing! so silly! wicked!
Phil Nichol maintains his position as my favourite new comedian!

it's The Book Club with Robin Ince tonight and Simon Munnery Friday so i'll keep you posted on how much my sides hurt after all this hilarity!

all these late nights mid-week are no good for my good looks tho! i'm going to be using a lot of my YSL highlighter pen this week me thinx! haha

this arvo i've been having proper comedy flashbacks to moments of comedy nakedness and catchphrase! a comedy hangover is loads more fun than a vodka one! haha*

but i'm already dreading the inevitable comedy comedown! ruined! it's a good job we have good comedy access in Mcr and Sheffield or i might have to go cold turkey!


*Sacrilege! Jodester in comedy beats vodka shocker! haha

the green cross code

hello there children

always remember your green cross code!

i witnessed a girl getting knocked over on Sunday night at a pedestrian crossing

she was in a hurry i suppose

i hope she's okay, i didn't hang around to find out as i was on my way to meet a friend*

but oh my god! i'm so wary of crossing roads now!**

thing is it was her own fault for running out into a road that had just changed from red to green. sure the car was possibly speeding up along the right hand lane to have come from nowhere like that but she should've just waited to cross like i did!

she was with a friend, possible boyfriend, who ran out after her - but fortunately escaped being hit himself.

i keep getting flashbacks of the moment her legs flew thru the air.

terrifying.

maybe they need witnesses to the accident.

i really do hope she's ok.


*ironically to watch some comedy. i have to say Russell Brand worked hard for his money and i was giggling away before too long. Which is not what i can say about his support act Trevor Lock who is yet to find a style all of his own. Frankie Howard and Harry Hill spring to mind immediately.

**this is annoying because my boyf always gives me a hard time for crossing roads at my leisure - as opposed to waiting for the green man. i am a busy lady. i do not however cross if i can't see the road! (heavy sigh)

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

she reaches parts other personal trainers just don't reach

blogs are like buses. discuss.

hehe
anyhoo - i'm aching today!
i have a new personal trainer called Erin.
she's from Australia and she likes Guinness. brilliant news!
i had to sack my last one for being too rubbish but this new one is super duper!

last week for our first session i hurt all the next day in places i didn't know i had!
today after another session i am again discovering its possible to hurt in places i didn't know where there!

which of course is brilliant news - that's what personal trainers are supposed to do!
i only have one more session before my pikey personal trainer bundle i bought when i joined runs out but hopefully she'll have given me lots to work on to get me thru winter!

i have been rubbish about going the gym the last month - only been once a week! i ain't gonna get any fitter with that attitude now am i? haha

mmm... chocolate....

something to make you smile

i won a competition!

not only that - it was called the 'something to make us smile' competition and it was to win a big yellow teeshirt from the people who made Little Miss Sunshine*

the Cornerhouse in Manchester sent me an email newsletter and challenged entrants to make the team smile for a chance to win! brilliant competition! just plani upbeat! haha

i rose to the occasion with a little pic i'd found a few months back of a couple of elderly ladies enjoying the beach - floral bathing suits and swim caps a-go-go!

so i won! amazing! and so nice to think that someone else appreciated the little old ladies too! i picked up my prize on Saturday when i went to see the Neil Diamond documentary and got a tte. cap, notbook and pen! haha my man said i looked like a nerd in my big yellow cap but i like it!**

on the high of my big win i entered a text comp to win flights to new york - but i probly won't win that one! there was no creative element to entering this one - just give us yer 50p and we'll pull a name out of a hat in 3 months time or something like that... boring!


*this is a really good movie! go see! : )

** i can wear it mondays to thursdays and he'd never know! haha

a week rolls by and no blog!

my gosh! how time flies when you're busy at work!
i can't believe i haven't blogged in a week! haha
been earning my money this week obviously!

funny things happen on buses.
it's true! listen to this!

i was travelling into town to meet Jo from work for a beer before comedy* and i got a text from her saying she was on her way.
i text her back to say i was on the bus.
20 minutes later she says she's on the bus - should be there on time.
i text and say i'm on the bus but i might be late cos i was still 20 minutes away from where we were sposed to meet in 10 minutes!
10 minutes later we're on Oxford Rd and i hear 'Jodie is that you?'
it's Jo.
she'd got on my bus about 15 minutes earlier and we'd been texting each other on the same bus!
d'oh!
haha, insane.
we giggled a lot.
as did the girls sat opposite her who overheard our ridiculous story!
what a couple of geeks. haha


*comedy at the Zumebar which has mysteriously vanished into, what i can only imagine is a parallel comedy universe, where they're all having a proper laugh without us : (
refurbishment apparently, very odd on the week's eve of the comedy festival...

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

high maintenance

i went to see The Devil Wears Prada last night and it was fabulous!

top chick flick if ever i saw one - lots of gorgeous shoes, outfits and a hottie thrown in for good measure! my man would've hated it but that's cos he just doesn't understand!

Meryl Streep was fabulous as the ice queen editor. she does deplorable things to her new 2nd assistant and yet so stylish! haha

it was like watching your favourite magazine come to life for and hour and a half - just fabulous! haha

one great line that sticks out was when the 1st assistant tells Andy the 2nd assistant and protaganist of our movie she's found a great new diet, no eating until you're going to faint and then eat a tiny cube of cheese... cue much laughter from the ladies of the house!

as we walked out the cinema having seen all the glamour and high heels i felt decidedly frumpy and even thought in the end the moral is 'it's what's inside that counts girls' you couldn't help but want to straighten your hair and drop a dress size! haha

sooo glad i went to the gym and skipped any popcorn last night!

Monday, October 09, 2006

knock knock

my man did some stand up on Friday night - well, he tried to do some stand up - it was more like 2 and a half minutes of him looking scared on stage! haha
it takes serious b*ll*cks getting up and trying to make peeps laugh tho so i have nothing but respect for him for having a go at all*

what was weird is recognising all the new acts trying their luck inSheffield - we'd seen nearly all of them in Manchester's Giggle n Funk night at the Zumeba
i was guessing the gags!
mental!
i've gotta spend my weekends doing something else man - i feel like i'm suffering from comedy overexposure!**

it's the manchester comedy festival in a week or so and i'm really looking forward to it - i'm not happy that i have work to go to inbetween all the fabulous comedy i'm lining up for myself though - ruined! that will get in the way of the beer! haha
but will i need to go cold turkey for a month afters? i don't wanna know everyones gags! i wanna enjoy comedy not 'know' it! haha

my flexible friend hasn't even recovered from the edinburgh comedy festival so i don't know what it will think of another bashing... expensive hobby this comedy m'larky!***



*which is what i haven't done! yet... haha - watch out world! knock knock...

**not entirely disimilar to when, over a period of a couple of weeks while at university, i over-indulged on Linda McCartney Sausage Rolls. can't even look at them now. ruined! they were really nice! haha

***except for Giggle n Funk at the Zumeba - tres affordable at five punds a pop! haha - will they put ME on the guest list now? haha

Friday, October 06, 2006

beerfest

i went to a beerfest last night!

amazingly good fun - felt like a student again!

i also went to the fab cafe on wednesday night for their quiz night which was also great fun, although the hi density of students in there didn't make me feel like one of them. instead i felt old! haha

i was chatting with some galpals about how i used to drink heavy duty amounts of beer every night at uni and then thru into my early post-uni life in London. how on earth did i get up for work the next day? insane how the body can take so much crap when you're younger!

but back to the beerfest. some sweating and overfriendly bloke comes up to me and says with knowing twinkle 'if the next song is 'Loveshack' will you dance with me?' so i felt game and knew that he knew the next song was Loveshack and said 'YES!' i think he was a bit put out that i wasn't overawed by his phsyic abilities to predict the next track but i think he'd been at the beerfest a lot longer than me and so was quite intoxicated! haha
the beer was served by 'wenches' and waiters in 'leiderhosen' ? how the heck do you spell leiderhosen?! and you could buy horned helmets, big moustaches and blonde plaits - all very amusing and they served up the beer in the biggest glasses i've ever seen! haha
i wouldv'e smuggled one out but it was just too big! where can i buy one of those?!

the students only recently came out in force again cos its the beginning of the new academic year. it has made me nostalgic for the mid-week partying and carefree existence but i know in reality that they're just putting real life on hold and once you graduate you get a real nasty bump back to reality! haha they won't extend that overdraft again for a while! haha

that is all.

Monday, October 02, 2006

bargain basement wonder woman



this weekend i was WonderWoman!

i had a WW oufit when i was eight years old and had a lot less issues with getting my thighs out back then...

my poor man was very stressed cos i was truly mortified for about 72 hours at the thought of going to a party with all my work collegaues dressed as a super hero in - let's face it - a pair of star spangled knickers!

but i'd committed and fought for the right to be WW so there was no backing out! i ain't no fancy dress p#ssy! i was most proud of my 75p homemade accessories, my crown was the best thing i've ever made - ever! haha

fancy dress parties shouldn't be so stressful, but i'm glad i went thru with it cos i had the beautiful experience of overhearing a bloke pronounce incredulously 'i just saw Wonder Woman' as i went past a doorway and knew he meant me! yay!

other news this weekend is Children of Men starring the very tasty Clive Owen is amazing! The book by PD James has been made into a film and frankly did not disappoint! i was gripped thru-out! my man was blown away and couldn't speak for the next hour! haha - go see it!

we also continued our patronage to the comedy night Giggle n Funk at the Zumeba on Friday, we're SO their favourite regulars! hehe