the day i should have stayed in bed

there are some days in life when it feels like anything that could go wrong will go wrong.

i am still suffering the emotional scars of such a day because i had one just recently!

let me tell you what happened...

i was in Yorkshire to stay with a friend in a lovely lodge in the Dales, it would have been for the whole weekend but another friend had booked me in the Midlands for the Saturday night...

So after a very fun Friday night in the pub (we even stumbled across an Ale Festival! pun intended!) and a quick whizz round the local castle and theatre on Saturday morning i set off back down south...

apart from the 50mph zone with no actual road works being done (why do they do this to us?!) it all started off ok... but then a warning about a closed junction on a motorway up ahead made itself known and since i wasn't familiar with the area i pressed onwards figuring there would be a diversion signposted.

then nearing said junction i tried to get creative and got off on an A road that probably went in the same direction... only for SatNav to make me nervous and turn me back around... after 20 mins sat in traffic avoiding the motorway problem... why i thought i best turn back i have no clue.. i was tired and wanted to get home asap i guess... so back to the motorway i went and immediately hit on a problem on the slip road...

an RAC van had parked infront of the right hand lane and i assumed there had been an accident and drove onto the slip road... but then all the cars in front of me - all of them mind - started doing u-turns to try and leave the slip road, hence the traffic facing the wrong direction being held up by the RAC man... i put my window down and asked a older guy what was happening and he told me the motorway was blocked off and 'you can't get on'

my next mistake was to take this man at his word. what he meant - or had been told himself by another numbnut was the motorway was fast becoming a carpark due to the closed junction a few miles up ahead... but hindsight is a wonderful painful thing isn't it.

i thought i couldn't get on the motorway so i also did a u-turn. it was about this time that the traffic police turned up. i thought well they'll sort things out and tell me where to go. no they just took my number plate and shouted at me for facing the wrong way and 'you knew what you were doing. it's illegal to be faced this way on a slip road.' really? in all scenerios? like if you wouldn't get on the motorway because of an accident? really? i doubt it. but a policeman never told me to move so i made a mistake. the worst thing is the guys behind me knew that he was toruble and did a bunk before he could show up and get their numbers so i was one of the lucky few who actually waited to speak to him about what was happening. what an idiot!

so i turned around again and headed onto the motorway - sorry car park - and waited 90 minutes while they dealt with a 'police incident' on the closed section of the road. after an hour i was beginning to need a wee but luckily i held onto it haha or there would have been another thing they could punish me for! the call of nature must be obeyed right?! not on the motorways apparently!

so now i wait. will they punish me to the letter of the law or realise it was just a mistake and too much paperwork to deal with. or perhaps they have a target i just helped them reach? who knows. i guess i'll find out in the next few weeks. but it was truly an awful experience and not one i wish to ever repeat!

finally a footnote. just after i escape my traffic jam my friend who is meeting me in the Midlands calls it off sick due to a hangover. so it was all for nothing.

there's no justice. i had to write it up as a learn. don't try and do too much stuff in one weekend! you'll only get a numb bum! haha